The View from the Upward Spiral is Different than from the Downward Spiral

I love the view from the upward spiral.  I love seeing the unexpected, the possibilities and feeling the fun, and I have come to recognize how different it is from the view from the downward spiral.  The difference is not because our actual eyes are different, but because the interpretation of what the eyes are seeing is different.  We have access to a whole different collection of synapses from a perspective of appreciation than from fault finding.

How can that be?  Well  Beau Lotto, a professor of neuroscience, shares in his book "Deviate" that our physical eyes make up about 10% of what we 'see'.  The other 90% is our personal interpretation of what the eyes are seeing.  That's how you can have one person loving and one person hating the same movie.  Or, how you can have two totally different accounts of the same situation.

Why would I care about that?  Well, if 90% of my experience of life is based on interpretation I have some wiggle room, some flexibility, some choices and options that I can consider.  It means there are some answers and possibilities out there that I may not be currently seeing because of my interpretation of something.  It means that there is an upward spiral view that I can find.

Once again, LOP is less about what is right and wrong and more about what do I want to be right about?

LOP is loving the view through the eyes of appreciation.

"I Can See Clearly Now."

Posted to Facebook January 17th, 2023

"I Can See Clearly Now" -- Johnny Nash  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FscIgtDJFXg 

I promise you, on the other side of whatever clouds might be in your life right now, there is a bright sunshiny day. 

Love the Goosebumps

Goosebumps are an indicator of being on the upward spiral -- me being in agreement with WIRA.

LOP is lovin' them goosebumps.

Unconditional Love

I do my best to choose unconditional love in my daily moments not for others, although my relationships benefit enormously when I do, but for me and my peace.  Because . . . Unconditional Love = Freedom.

Living On Purpose (LOP) is remembering I am free.

Thoreau Living On Purpose at Walden Pond

As I read the words of Thoreau in his book Walden; or, Life in the Woods, I am filled with the knowing that:  Our support is implicit; Our understanding inevitable; Our assistance eternal; and
Our journey simple.

As others express Who They Really Are it is easier for each of us to believe in Who We Really Are.

LOP is the path untravelled.

It's Not the What, it's the How

A while ago I heard the Facebook whistleblower, Frances Haugen, say, "No one at Facebook is malevolent, but the incentives are misaligned".  For me this statement held so much wisdom and depth to what we seem to be experiencing in many ways, in many places, about so many things.

A cornerstone of LOP is the belief that all of us want to feel better, and in our own way are pursuing that as best we can each day.  I am not saying all our methods are constructive, but I do believe that there isn't anyone who wakes up in the morning saying, "I want to have the most miserable day I possibly can."

So, as I watch some of what is going on in the world, and I hold in mind the belief we all are wanting to feel better, I keep thinking that maybe it is not the what that we all disagree on (no one is being malevolent, no one wants to have a miserable day) it's the how to do things that we are argue, fight, kill each other over (our incentives are just misaligned, we are not very constructive).  And if we generally agree on the what maybe we will be in a better/less defensive/less protective state when we discuss how we are wanting to move forward.  

So, if we pretend that we all agree that the 'what' equates to feeling good/better/more of who we really are, then why all the conflict?  I think it is because of the different possibilities on 'how' we can get there.  We spend our time and energy defending our 'how' over someone else's 'how', but if we are all heading to the same place (feeling good/being who we really are) does it matter if someone uses the same how as me?  If I really trusted that we are wanting the same thing would I be spending my energy to prove them wrong? 

• Maybe remembering we are truly all after the same thing will help us let go of our need to defend our individual 'hows'? 
• Maybe we could trust more that our 'hows' are as right for us as theirs are for them?
• Maybe when I am fearful of their 'how', it's because I am choosing fear over trust?
  
• Maybe as I get better at knowing that I get to choose how I want to feel/respond/perceive I will be less fearful of their 'hows'?
• Maybe if we decided that it is not really their choice of 'hows' that feels so awful, but it is actually us resisting their 'hows' instead of moving forward with our 'hows' that feels awful?
• Maybe as we free up a whole lot of time and energy for us to move forward with our 'hows' and achieve the 'what' of feeling better, we will understand their 'hows' better?
• Maybe when I resist someone else's how I am actually slowing down them discovering the 'how' that will end up working for many of us.
  
• Maybe the variety of all these 'hows' are the perfect ingredient for creating the harmony we are truly after?
• Maybe all of these different 'hows' were just a really great way for us to learn to trust each other, which is the 'what' we were after the whole time. 
  

LOP is trusting we agree on the 'what' and allowing all of us to pursue our own 'hows'.

"Deviate -- The Science of Seeing Differently" by Beau Lotto

Feeling angry?  Congratulations!

Feeling overwhelmed?  Awesome!

Frustrated?  Fantastic!

Worried?  Perfect!

According to Beau Lotto, in his book "Deviate -- The Science of Seeing Differently", these emotional experiences are all perfect opportunities for us to see beyond the assumptions that limit us and keep us trapped in doing the same old thing but wanting different results.  

The reading of this book has been a huge "Yes" for me.  I've truly enjoyed his perspective about how and why we humans behave the way we do, and how to be more of who we really are (my words, not his).

So if you are aware of experiencing some downward spiral emotions and you are ready to use them to your benefit (as the gold mine that they truly are), I would recommend this read . . . and I rarely feel inspired to recommend anything : )

Excerpt:

"Beau Lotto, the world-renowned neuroscientist, entrepreneur, and two-time TED speaker, takes us on a tour of how we perceive the world, and how disrupting it leads us to create and innovate.

Perception is the foundation of human experience, but few of us understand why we see what we do, much less how. By revealing the startling truths about the brain and its perceptions, Beau Lotto shows that the next big innovation is not a new technology: it is a new way of seeing.  In his first major book, Lotto draws on over two decades of pioneering research to explain that our brain didn't evolve to see the world accurately. It can't! 

Visually stunning, with entertaining illustrations and optical illusions throughout, and with clear and comprehensive explanations of the science behind how our perceptions operate, Deviate will revolutionize the way you see yourself, others and the world.

With this new understanding of how the brain functions, Deviate is not just an illuminating account of the neuroscience of thought, behavior, and creativity: it is a call to action, enlisting readers in their own journey of self-discovery."

Yesses

Posted to Facebook December 29th, 2021

LOP, or living on the upward spiral, is recognizing and having faith in the momentum of my yesses.  These are not the yesses we may automatically think of, and have become accustomed to, that feel more like obligations, 'have-tos', or 'shoulds'.  The yesses I am referring to are honest, exciting, fun, life-giving, tickling, joyous, and sometimes what might appear to be silly or illogical inspirations that fill our hearts.  They are the yesses that are perfect for right now in this moment.

LOP yesses are what we are inspired to from the upward spiral, not the downward spiral.  So, the first step is to get on the upward spiral.  If I want to confirm that a yes is inspired from the upward spiral I can ask myself, "is the payoff for this yes in the future (chasing a condition) or in the now (pure joy of the yes)?"

Once I am on the upward spiral there are a million and one ways to practice yessing my way through my day.  Just remember to take a second and ask yourself . . . 

What's my yes right now?
What's my yes in this situation?
What's my yes to this question?
What's my yes on this menu?

What's my yes about where to park?

What's my yes about responding to this text or email?
What's my yes about where I live?
What's my yes about what I like to wear?
What's my yes about what I want to drive?
What's my yes just for the sake that it makes my heart sing?
What's the yes that I cannot not do?
What's my yes around this situation that has just shown up, that I now have new clarity, and a new more specific yes?
What's my yes for what I want to watch on T.V.?
What's my yes for who I associate with?
What's the best feeling yes in this instant?  

As ideas of possible yesses start to pop into my mind (and I promise you that from the upward spiral there will be an untapped stream of them), I can use some questions as a kind of litmus test to distinguish between yesses that are being WIRA, and what might just be my habitual/routine yesses.
1.  Am I wanting to do this to somehow justify myself/my worthiness?
2.  Am I doing this because I am concerned about how someone else may view me?
3.  Am I choosing this from a place of trying to push/force/control/be right about a certain outcome?

When my answer to any of these is yes I personally get suspicious of myself that this particular yes, at this particular time, has an ulterior motive other than being WIRA.  Which just means taking a step back and ensuring I am solidly on the upward spiral.  

LOP is recognizing and trusting my yesses on the upward spiral and seeing where WIRA is ready to take me.

Happy New Year!  I wish you tons of fun following the yesses of 2022!

Trusting My Success

Many of us have probably been taught to believe that success is about getting the house and the car and the job and the family, and about the number of 'Likes' we get on social media.  Recently fame and fortune have become biggies as well.  The unspoken message behind all of this is if we get all those things we will be deemed successful through the eyes of others, and at that point we will be happy.  

But doesn't that seem like we are doomed to a long road of unhappiness until we reach some future that may or may not happen way down the road? (And don't even get me started about when we compare ourselves to others and there are always those that are more successful, so we never really allow ourselves to be happy even we if we achieve the above list).  As well, you may have also noticed that some people get the house and the car and the 'Likes' and are miserable and stressed out anyways?  It's like their happiness was built on a house of cards.  So maybe the attainment of a certain set of goals is not necessarily a very good definition?  Maybe we could have a more successful definition of success?

A tripping point in the above definition is it is based in the belief that the way we feel comes from outside of ourselves (i.e. when I get these things, and the approval, then I will feel successful, and finally feel good about myself), however, in LOP that is backwards, success starts on the inside.  It comes from how we feel when we know who we really are (WWRA).  It comes from being in alignment with our priorities.  And it comes from trusting what we are inspired to do.  This LOP experience of success is achievable now, not some goal in the future with which I hold my happiness hostage.

As we LOP in each moment, with each baby step we take in our day, our lives naturally flow beyond the experience of mediocrity we often had planned for ourselves.  It doesn't matter if we achieve what others have told us we should be, because we are already living what we were truly after -- a joyous, fulfilled, happy, fun, creative, expansive life.

LOP is knowing that when I am trusting Who I Really Am it doesn't matter where it leads.

Freedom

I am realizing, that by it's definition, freedom cannot be something you get from another, because if someone is giving you freedom, they can also take it away.   

Getting freedom from somebody is like living in the Matrix.  You think you're free, but it is not real.  So I guess the question is what kind of freedom are we really wanting?  To be free, or just live the appearance of freedom?  I cannot even write this and claim that one choice is better than the other (there are those in the movie that deliberately choose to live in the Matrix), because that choice is the absoluteness of our freedom.

As I follow this concept to it's depths I see how we are all free . . . all of the time.  We are free because we are choosing the upward or downward spiral in every second.  I know many may perceive that statement as 'blaming the victim' kind of mentality, but I promise you, I speak it from a place of wanting us to know our power and to have true control in our lives.  I am familiar with the ease with which we end up feeling a lack of freedom in so many of our moments as I have witnessed myself making choices unconsciously, accidentally, or habitually.  As much as, somedays, I would like it not to be so, I have come to know that the only freedom that will ever satisfy me comes when I manage my focus, find the solidity of WIRA, and trust what is real for me.

I am not saying for one minute that I remember my innate freedom all of the time.  I am not saying that I haven't at times wallowed on the downward spiral of victimhood for days, weeks or months.  I am not saying that moving beyond the habit of the downward spiral is necessarily easy, because it does require being conscious and making new choices.  I am just saying that I have come to realize that the only way for me to truly feel free is to realize my ability to respond, make choices, and move in the direction of the upward spiral.

I know there are things going on in the world that some will say, "Come on Sandi, these people have definitely had their freedom taken away."  I understand that, and I wish it not for them.  But neither does it feel good, to me, to look upon them as victims and strip them of their power, hope, potential, and innate beauty -- their true freedom.  When I was depressed it was bad enough that I felt I was a loser, but it was even worse when others joined me and believed I was unable too.  What I needed was others who would assist me from a place of believing in who I really was and trusted in my able-ness.

Fortunately, most of us will never experience the extreme situations that some experience, but we still have our own circumstances where we feel we are out of control and have lost our freedom, (i.e. the death of a loved one, loss of employment, poverty, illness, family issues, societal changes).  But because there have been those who have experienced extreme situations and found their freedom it inspires me to know that it is possible for me too -- their examples show me the way.  A couple of these examples that have always stood out are Vicktor Frankl and his story of surviving a concentration camp in his book "Man's Search for Meaning", and Nelson Mandela who seemed to transform during his imprisonment and returned to life not bitter and resentful, but ready to lead his people to freedom.  The movie "Invictus" used William Ernest Henley's poem, by the same title, to encapsulate his realization.

It matters not how strait the gate,

      How charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate,

      I am the captain of my soul.

Is knowing our innate freedom our usual perspective?  No.  

Is it what most are doing?  No.  

Is it possible?  Yes.  

Is it what our world is ready for? . . .  I think, perhaps, we are witnessing all over the world, the yearning of people to know their real freedom.  

LOP is the journey of following the wiffs of freedom to the power and beauty of  WWRA.