Love Feels Better Than Pity

Posted to Facebook Nov. 26th
I cannot feel pity or sorry for someone without believing they are lesser than who they really are (WTRA).
Me perceiving someone as lesser than WTRA feels terrible.
When I feel terrible I tend to feel even more pity or sorry for myself and others.
When I feel increased pity or sorrow for myself and others I see even less of WWRA.
When I see less of WWRA, that feels even worse.
When I am down there feeling worse than terrible, I am more likely to drag others down with me.
When I am more likely to drag others down with me, I am no use to anyone.
When I am no use to anyone I feel sorry for myself and . . . . well you can see where this downward spiral is going.

When I appreciate and believe in someone, no matter what they are experiencing, I am believing in WTRA.
When I believe in WTRA I feel good.
When I feel good I find more things to appreciate and admire about myself and others.
When I appreciate and admire I feel even better.
When I feel even better I become a bright light that is easy to see.
When I am bright light that is easy to see others may or may not choose to follow, but it doesn't matter because I feel good, I believe in WTRA, and I am loving them anyways -- and love always feels better than pity.

The Best Gift Ever

Posted to Facebook Nov. 22
To me, there is nothing more beautiful/honest/courageous/inspiring than someone sharing who they really are (WTRA); 'finding their voice' so to speak; coming into their own.

Over the years of working with individuals and groups, getting to see who people really are has been the best gifts I have ever received.  So, I guess that's the best thing I can ever give.

LOP is giving the world who we really are.

Choosing Open

Posted to Facebook Nov. 12th.
Back in August I shared that I was reading "The Untethered Soul".  This book ended up in my hands at a time when I realized I was ready to move beyond any essence of 'protection' I still had going on in my life.  Meaning, I was wanting to move beyond making any decisions and taking any action from a place of fear or worry, or trying to protect myself from what might happen, or trying to ignore something that I was unconsciously dreading or fearful about.  All of those essences only keep me small and do not allow me to continue on the journey of LOP and realizing who I really am (WIRA).  And besides, they feel yucky.

The concept that stood out for me in Michael Singer's book was the idea of choosing to remain open instead of closing, no matter what was going on.  This means I choose love . . . appreciation . . . trust . . . moving forward because that is WIRA.  Michael explained that we stay open simply by making the choice to keep our hearts open.  I find this is so powerful because even though our reaction of closing our hearts to protect ourselves seems to be the common sense, knee jerk reaction, it is the closing of our hearts that creates the pain/discomfort in our lives.
So:
The snow comes and the driving is different -- I choose to stay open.
I make an appointment with someone and they are two hours late -- I choose to stay open.
My dad goes into the hospital -- I choose to stay open.
There are unexpected repair bills -- I choose to stay open.
I am not sure how some things are going to work out -- I choose to stay open.
There are government systems in place that are choosing things for our family we don't think we would choose -- I choose to stay open.
There are things I am being asked that I do not immediately have answers for -- I choose to stay open.
My dad is being moved to a nursing home -- I choose to stay open.
My mom wishes my dad was coming home -- I choose to stay open.
My relationship with my dad is changing -- I choose to stay open.
There are financial decisions that are coming in the not so distant future on which we are still looking for clarity -- I choose to stay open.
Not everyone sees things the way I do -- I choose to stay open.
I make plans for my day and then other things come along and become a priority -- I choose to stay open.
People do things differently than how I had asked them to -- I choose to stay open.
I do not complete all the things I think I should be -- I choose to stay open.
I am not staying open in some moments as well as I would like to -- I choose to stay open.

I choose to stay open because that is WIRA and my outside experiences do not dictate my inside experiences -- I create my experiences by LOP. 

If You Can't Say Anything Nice . . .

As my sister and I were growing up, and learning about relationships, I must have heard our mom say to us a thousand times, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all."  I am sure Mom was wanting for us to learn how to treat each other kindly, however, the wisdom within that saying has unfolded for me as time has gone on.

Perhaps, for many of us, the person who can drag us off into the bushes the most is ourselves.  It's not intentional, we really are trying to feel good, we really do want to see our answers.  We are probably just relying on a habit that does not work very well. 

I had thought the "if I can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" motto was for my sister's benefit, but really it was for me.  I want to get beyond using any of my moments for being right about what I don't want, justifying them, explaining them, or using them for comic relief, and get to what I do want.  I want to catch myself when I am about to say something that is more of what I don't want and, "don't say anything at all," or use that time to explain what I do want.

Go figure, Mom was right!

180 Degree Turn

Posted to Facebook October 23rd.
In many ways LOP can feel like a 180 degree turn from what I have observed as 'normal' or what I have tried to force myself to believe.  Words to describe this difference came to me the other day when I said to a friend, "It's the difference between my life driving me and me driving my life ."  In one I believe that the world outside of me dictates my life, and in the other I believe that I get to choose what I like best.

'My life driving me' may at first seem easier because I am leaving the decisions and processes up to someone else.  However, eventually it can start to feel like obligation, necessity, a heavy weight, like I am trying to push and control things into place.  Things can feel required of me, like I need to hurry, abide by a list of shoulds, or rush through my days.  At one end of the 'my life driving me' spectrum I may feel immense boredom, mediocrity, monotony, and caught in a cycle of constant maintenance.  At the other end I feel exhaustion, overwhelment, or suffocation.

'Me driving my life' feels like curiosity, enthusiasm, and well-being; it feels easy, natural, energizing, exciting, creative, inspiring, adventurous and fun.  Me driving my life has a natural flow, and even though I may have moments of questioning if others will accept it, there is a knowing that this is the path I want to explore.

LOP can at times appear to be impossible, or incorrect, because it is the opposite of what we have experienced.   It may seem the whole world would have to change to make it a reality, but it doesn't.  The 180 degree turn happens as I come to remember the fun of being in the driver's seat.

"K-PAX"

Posted to Facebook October 17th.

The Movie "K-PAX"

Directed by Iain Softley

Adapted from the novel by Gene Brewer

After Prot informs the psychiatrist that they have no laws, and no lawyers on his planet . . .

Psychiatrist:  "Well, how do you know right from wrong?"

Prot:  "Every being in the Universe knows right from wrong."

Happy Thanksgiving!

Posted to Facebook October 8th.
Thanksgiving . . . a holiday to practice appreciating.

I appreciate that the sun rises everyday.
I appreciate that it is not my job to make sure the sun rises everyday.
I appreciate all four seasons, and that I can feel excited anticipation for each of the changes.
I appreciate the experience of depression that created such clarity and passion in my life.
I appreciate my thumbs and fingers that allow me to type these words.
I appreciate Joannes Gutenberg who made it possible for all the books that I love to love.
I appreciate all those who have gone before me, whom I now stand on the shoulders of, to reach new adventures.
I appreciate my sense of taste that helped create my enjoyment of the turkey and pumpkin pie.
I appreciate the family and friends in my life that provide the continuous support and learning about WIRA.
I appreciate the technologies that allow me to share my appreciations.
I appreciate all the opportunities I have had in my life, and all the possibilities that wait in the wings.
I appreciate that birds sing and cows moo, and not the other way around.  (LOL)
I appreciate belly laughs.
I appreciate that I can appreciate, because it feels so good.

Happy Appreciating!

LOP is Expressing (Part 3)

Posted to Facebook October 11th.
The foundation of Living On Purpose (LOP), for me, is that we all want to feel good, and that we are all geniuses (no one can be me as well as I can).  The three aspects I have witnessed myself experiencing as I learn how to feel good and be my genius self I describe as remembering, believing in, and expressing who I really am (WIRA), which I am doing to some degree in every moment.

The third part of LOP, Expressing WIRA, has been about listening.
Listening to what I am telling myself.
Listening to what I am wanting to be right about.
Listening to what I know beyond my 'shoulds' and 'have tos'.
Listening to when something doesn't feel good and deliberately making a different choice.
Listening to the little thoughts of inspiration and trusting them.
Listening to the big thoughts of inspiration and trusting them.
Listening to the people and situations that cruise across my path.
Listening when I seem to be getting the same message over and over again.
Listening to what feels good and knowing it is suppose to feel that way.
Listening to what I am inspired to say.
Listening to what I am inspired to do.
Listening to the reminders to stay open.
Listening to what and when I want to eat, wear, watch, read, clean, repair, change, create, or try something.
Listening when it is time to take action, and when it is time to listen.

Listening -- because I have all my answers, if I just listen.

LOP is Believing (Part 2)

Posted to Facebook October 6th.
The foundation of Living On Purpose (LOP), for me, is that we all want to feel good, and that we are all geniuses (no one can be me as well as I can).  The three aspects I have witnessed myself experiencing as I learn how to feel good and be my genius self I describe as remembering, believing in, and expressing who I really am (WIRA), which I am doing to some degree in every moment.

The second part, Believing in WIRA, has been about:
-- giving myself the time and space to remember WIRA, because as I remember I naturally believe.
-- ignoring the external voices when I am having challenges hearing Me.
-- remembering to breathe.
-- being picky about the books/movies/people/activities that I participate in.
-- quieting the internal chatter by consciously reminding myself WIRA.
-- having conversations with those who are able to hear and support me in believing in WIRA.
-- participating in morning rituals that help me connect with WIRA (i.e. meditation, journaling, a walk, yoga, reading inspirational material).
-- physical activity/workouts.
-- eating and drinking those things that make it easy to remember WIRA.
-- paying attention to what beliefs/thoughts feel best to me.
-- not pushing myself forward when I know I am not believing in WIRA as strongly as I want (can also refer to this as confidence).
-- letting go of trying to convince anyone of anything.  Me knowing WIRA is enough.
-- listening to the truth of Me that is sometimes buried under some 'shoulds'.
-- surrendering comparisons.
-- playing/laughing/appreciating.
-- finding that feeling of pure knowing.

LOP is believing in WIRA even when there is no physical evidence/confirmation/belief outside of me.

LOP is Remembering (Part 1)

Posted to Facebook October 5th.
The foundation of Living On Purpose (LOP), for me, is that we all want to feel good, and that we are all geniuses (no one can be me as well as I can).  The three aspects I have witnessed myself experiencing as I learn how to feel good and be my genius self I describe as remembering, believing in, and expressing who I really am (WIRA), which I am doing to some degree in every moment.

The first part, Remembering WIRA, has been about:
-- recalling the things I use to do, and the ways of being I would naturally be as a child.
-- noticing things I have done my whole life, and perhaps have even told myself that I do too much.
-- paying attention to what topics/books/movies/conversations/hobbies I tend to gravitate towards.
-- watching what I naturally do more of when I am wanting fun or relaxation or peace.
-- recognizing those moments when I am really enjoying life.
-- hearing what others say they appreciate about me or what I did well.
-- acknowledging those things that seemed easy, automatic, or second nature to do.
-- admitting what I was doing the last time I was having a really good time.
-- going my own pace.
-- trusting myself enough to like what like.
-- surrounding myself with what feels good.
-- letting go of the beliefs that I picked up along the way, that I now know are not what I really believe.
-- asking myself, "through what eyes am I seeing others when I am appreciating them most?"
-- allowing the inspirations that exist beyond the motivations of guilt or justification.
-- discovering what I am ready for when I am not busy protecting myself from life.
-- observing those times when I am swept up in a moment of knowing that some way, some how, all is well.

And, remembering WIRA is not so much about what I was doing in all of the above situations, but about who I was being.